rub-a-dub-dub
three guys in a clubcalled Boys Town
just across the Mexican line
and I was lookin' so
fine
when she came over to me
so fresh-faced
in what must have been
a blonde wig
i tried to read
her body language
but it was in Spanish
and the only words I
knew were quanto es?
and
while ultimately
legal tender
was exchanged
for counterfeit love
there was something there
that fit like a glove
and she wanted me to spend
the night
with the meter turned off
but
we were men of the road
and it was time to hit it
just outside of town
we spotted a peasant
lying prone in the ditch
drunk
or maybe dead
Jake stopped the car
and went sprinting back there
(thought maybe he was concerned)
but he came trotting back
with the man's hat in hand
and he wore that trophy
all the way to Panama
our code of the road
had been set
though we were still wet
behind the ears
we roared on outta there
lookin' for adventure
in whatever came our way
still eons away
from the day
when the sweet bird of youth
would take a massive crap
on our windshield
haha nice...might want to use the window rake at the next gas station...and i had a few of those adventures back in the day...the body language in spanish was a great line...
ReplyDeleteA well told tale :)
ReplyDeleteA great tale, as always, Timoteo......especially nice touch with the bird of youth crapping on the windshield. He crapped all over mine too - and that was before I even had a car :-)
ReplyDeleteA fresh face with a fake wing, counterfeit love with the meter turned off, I love how you capture so much in so few words. And the final image, the massive load of crap from a sweet bird of youth is so gritty. Since the load of crap comes after the sweet bird, makes the grittiness a surprise to me, a shock actually. Yup, I really really like this.
ReplyDeleteBRIAN,
ReplyDeleteWindow rake...great idea!
AYALA,
Thanks for looking in.
SHERRY,
There's no escaping that big load...one day you look in the mirror and see it has splatted right on top of your head, when you least expected it!
ARLENE,
Love your insightful comments.
Your poetry often unfolds like a film. I really like your style and voice. Sweet bird of youth crapping on the windshield. That is brilliant!
ReplyDeleteOne thing about misspent youth is they make such great tales, and you tell this one exceptionally well.
ReplyDeleteSELMA,
ReplyDeleteGlad you like my crappy poem!
MARY,
My entire youth was misspent, so there's more where that came from!
Life is for the living ... Crap and all ... Take it or leave it ... Thanks for reminding me, Tim ... I had my catnip for today ... Love you, friend, Always, cat.
ReplyDeleteCAT,
ReplyDeleteAnd knowing that we must embrace it all can give us a sense of peace. The Buddhists have a saying: "Don't fight against the river." Go with the flow...then, just before bedtime, you can happily say: ANOTHER DAY SHOT DOWN THE SEWER!
Love,
Timo
what button do you press on a menu for spanish body language? cinco? ocho?
ReplyDeletestripper limerick
ha! last stanza tickled me...
ReplyDeleteSomething of this youthful adventure put me in mind of Kerouac... though the last stanza was pure Timoteo!
ReplyDeleteI love this! Gave me a good laugh. This is my favorite part:
ReplyDelete"i tried to read
her body language
but it was in Spanish"
ZONGRIK,
ReplyDeleteAll I know is don't play B-17!
KERRY,
You're getting to know me well!
ROSEMARYMINT,
Thanks, my dahlink...I'm much better at reading body language in Spanish these days...and I often use the Braille method.
wow, love it. more stories, please! and i do love the end, but the whole thing is great.
ReplyDeleteSo now I see that your comment at my place was actually a strong contextual link to your entire philosophy of life. (And here I thought you were merely being a smartass.)
ReplyDeleteI liked your road poem, Timo--but you should never steal a hat from a drunk man in a stinking desert--that's just wrong. I don't even want to think about the karma you racked up there.
(very nice use of legal tender, btw)
haha...nice...love your way of storytelling tim...and brought back some memories of my own youth as well...
ReplyDeleteA unique narrative format here, with its juxtaposition of nursery rhyme, modernist structure, and colloquial language. Successful, ultimately, in its evocation of the dramatic in the everyday lifves of ordinary folk.
ReplyDeleteMARIAN,
ReplyDeleteThanks, and I will give you more goodies from back in the day.
CLAUDIA,
YOU did that stuff too? (For shame! :)
HEDGEWITCH,
Yuh see? I'm...uh...deeper than ya thought! (And I didn't steal the hat...anyway, the guy was close enough to town that he could have walked back in and got another one. If he wasn't dead, that is.)
SEMAPHORE,
I like the way you break things down!
Ha..ha...love the stories on the road. Who is naughty now :-)
ReplyDeleteHEAVEN,
ReplyDeleteHa, you got a point there, my provocative little peach!
I love the stories you tell! You are such a master of telling it like it happens.
ReplyDeleteTERESA,
ReplyDeleteI think I can interpret that as you wanting more. Okay...stay tuned!
I will listen to stories about Mexico all day long. This was a fantastic yarn and I love the opening. I love your style.
ReplyDeleteEnjoying youth before it's over. Carefree tale. Really like this one, its theme and tone. :)
ReplyDeleteLoved this. Ah and the wages of sin...the sweet bird of youth takes a massive crap eons later, Very clever,great narrative.
ReplyDeletewhile ultimately
ReplyDeletelegal tender
was exchanged
for counterfeit love
Loved these lines--loved the feel of the whole piece and love the last stanza---just loved how you feel in verse-
Came back for another dose--they just don't make enough road trips any more. I miss Mexico. (And I'm reassured to learn that the poor drunk fool didn't die of sunstroke in the desert, unless of course,he already had.)
ReplyDeleteHEROTOMOST, RAVENBLACK, CRESSIDA DE NOVA, AUDREY: Thank you, my dahlinks, you make the sun shine on a cloudy day.
ReplyDeleteJOY (HEDGEWITCH),
Unfortunately, it ain't the same Mexico it used to be. Probably never will be until drugs are decriminalized.
Read it again...it's just as good as the first time :)
ReplyDeleteAh, a tale of carefree youth, when it's a lark until it isn't.
ReplyDeleteLove this: "I tried to read/her body language/but it was in Spanish..."
AYALA,
ReplyDeleteThanks, dude!
PATTIKEN,
I like it when the body language is in Braille...you need to be a hands on kinda guy to read it.
What a terrific story you weave in this one! The young think they'll be cool forever, don't they? Isn't it amazing how only a few of us manage to hang on to our cool in our mature years? (ha!)
ReplyDeleteLOLAMOUSE,
ReplyDeleteYeah...just you and me, baby!