Pages

Showing posts with label Muslims. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Muslims. Show all posts

Sunday, January 8, 2017

PATIO PARTY



I.

I meet her at the party.
She is working for an agency
called Asians For Special Occasions,
renting herself out to PC folks who want
their social gatherings to appear culturally diverse.
I ask if she has done many similar events,
and she replies, "Oh, yes. in fact when you
see a Japanese, or Chinese, or Korean, or
Vietnamese, or Thai-looking person at a
party these days, they are likely from the agency."

(She isn't supposed
to drink the wine,
but I say here,
you can suck on mine.)

II.

There is a young middle-tier porn actress
there, recruited by the hosts
to add an air of decadent sophistication
to the assemblage. She looks like the
 girl next door--freckle splashed cheeks
 and nose--not like the skanky-looking
 babes from the early days of the business.

Someone asks if she ever gets
involved with the men she works with and
she says, "Guys are so PRESUMPTUOUS!
Just because I DO you--what in the world
would lead you to assume 
I would ever want to date you?"

(She's also not supposed to touch the vino,
but she's eyeing my glass,
so surreptitiously, I slip it to her.)

She grabs a handful of almonds from
the hors d'oeuvre table and says:
"Imagine if I were allergic to nuts."

III.

There is a Jewish woman wearing a head scarf.
She is posing as a Muslim. She's there for the
same reason as the other hired help. They couldn't
get the real thing on short notice, she confides, but
she has similar coloring, and everyone assumes.
Because of the head scarf, they assume.
"Perception is reality," she explains.
(I offer her a sip, but she says, "Better not...it would blow my cover.")

The hosts have thought of everything.
Except to have stocked enough wine.
When it runs out, I prepare to make my exit,
thanking the two of them--a white couple in their fifties--for their hospitality. The couple doesn't
know me, but each assumes the other one does.

Which is all well and good I say to myself
as I move, a little wobbly, toward the gate.

I wasn't invited.

Saturday, August 21, 2010

WACKOS









You think that the president is a Muslim
You think that toilet paper is for wearing on your head
You think that the president is a Muslim
You believe the bogeyman is underneath your bed

You think that the president is a Muslim
Your cake was left out in the rain
You think that the president is a Muslim
Because the bedbugs ate your brain

You think that the president is a Muslim
What he's told you doesn't matter
You think that the president is a Muslim
Cuz you're mad as a hatter

You think that the president is a Muslim
Because it feeds into your psychosis
You think that the president is a Muslim
Didja know ya got halitosis?

You think that the president is a Muslim
Now you're off to sniff some glue
You think that the president is a Muslim
Because there's something loose...and it's a SCREW!