We join Cactus Man at the local supermarket, where a relatively new trend is developing. Drugstores, markets, and the like are acting as collection points for various charities, and it is now commonplace for cashiers--at the behest of management-- to ask customers in the check out line if they would "like" (no pressure, of course) to donate money to the specific charity du jour. We'll conveniently add it to your bill.
CASHIER: Good morning sir, did you find everything okay?
C.M. Everything but my rear end...I seem to be losing it everyday in this economy.
CASHIER: (Oblivious, and ready to launch into her spiel): Oh, and would you like to donate a dollar to the Sisters of Perpetual Glum and Sorrow?
C.M.: Hmmm...you're the supermarket chain that touts "low prices everyday," are you not? And yet, I noticed that those rutabagas I bought are now a DOLLAR more per pound than they were last week...and most of your other prices have been steadily rising as well.
CASHIER: Well... ah...er...I only work here...
C.M. : (Raising his voice for nearby customers to hear) Last week I could have afforded to kick in that extra buck, but like most people these days, I'm on a budget. So who do you think is ultimately responsible for the Sisters of Perpetual Glum and Sorrow not getting that extra dollar in their pocket...ME? Or could it be...CORPORATE GREED???
CASHIER: Uhh...(hack...splutter...cough...choke...burp)... er...so did you find everything okay, sir?
C. M.: I'll find my way out the door is what I'll do--and likely never come back!
CASHIER: (brightly) Okay...next?
STAY TUNED FOR THE FURTHER ADVENTURES OF...CAAACTUUS MAAAAAANN...he's one PRICKLY dude!
