Monday, November 19, 2012


Don't get me wrong
I  love lovely language
and imagery
that  gives me goosebumps
for a couple of seconds
but if it all comes out
too wispy
like spun sugar
then I come away hungry

Need something I can bite into
and chew on for a while.
Need to detect
some semblance
of a thought process.
Need it to relate
to something
(like the price of tea in China)
if I'm gonna stay alive
cuz  I just can't survive
on that cotton candy verse...
here comes the hearse.

You're gazing into
your belly button
and you've gotten lost in there
and so have we.
Maybe it means
something to you
but  give me one clue
so I can join in the fun.

Yes you are lonely
and yes
you are horny
and the blood red rose of love
is so prickly and thorny
but what's that got to do
with anything but you?

Your words are exotic
and tacitly erotic
but how many different ways
can you say
I'm psychotic?

Don't think I'm unsympathetic
to what your failed romance meant
but the simple fact of the matter is
that love has made you incoherent!


  1. LOL
    Love can make most of us incoherent.

  2. I'm laughing my socks off. I'm always banging on that poetry must be understandable rather than airy fairy waffling, and you have put it so much better!

  3. smiles...i hear you man...i can not live on cotton candy or marshmallow fluff for long....def give me something i can chew and savor the flavor in...much longer...

  4. Harsh. I was with you for the first two unique stanzas and side-winded by cliche in the third before being drawn back in again. But saying what politeness forbids requires you to step in a puddle or two as you post into the paddock, doesn't it? Or, perhaps a shorter version? Yet, although I do not leave here untroubled, I also thank you for getting down to truth. I hesitated to say this much here for fear that one day the cliche and the cotton candy is all I can give out of my joie de vivre.

  5. KAY; You got that right.

    VIVINFRANCE: Thanks so much...good to know I'm not alone in this!

    KERRY: I don't mind doing it, long as you've got my back!

    BRIAN: LOL... Cotton candy used to make me sick when I was a kid...just sayin'

  6. SUSAN: Thanks for your feedback. Cliches become cliches because there is an element of truth in them, that's why they come into widespread usage...
    I don't mind using a cliche now and then if it is the most direct way to get at that truth.

  7. uh oh. *runs off to check belly button*

  8. So true. We need substance to live and to read. But so many people love cotton candy.

  9. I know just the verse of which you speak and I detect it instantly when I'm writing it...always a need for backing up and seeing things from a more fresh and meaty perspective. Great poem, Timoteo!!

  10. Oh, Timo, you always totally nail your topic. I, too, thought nervously of my bellybutton, as I read, as I do tend to drape my vision with rosy shades. But you always make me smile, and relate - that is your gift, that and your wonderful poems.

  11. I tend to avoid "artsy" poetry because I often can't figure what the author is trying to express. It becomes a Rorechak. Love can make one giddy. I don't write much poetry, but when I do, I'm usually sad.

  12. ... ha ha. Give me a good argument any day (and the mushy stuff can follow :)

  13. This is great and really made me laugh...but of course I'm guilty!

  14. oh ha ha...very well written and have got depth... in many context..loved it..

  15. This made me can make such a fool of some...uhhh....well, I have been a fool in love before. LOL

  16. MARIAN, THINGY, MYRNA, HANNAH, SHERRY, ARLENE, MARGARET, JEANNE, SREEJA, SUSIE: Thanks so much...I love how you've interpreted it in the spirit in which it was written!

  17. Made me chuckle!! And aren't we all guilty sometimes???!

  18. hahaha this poem rocks! i have to stand in the 'guilty' section, too - the one or other poem you described up there might have made its way to my blog.
    love your honesty and humor... well done!

  19. I am both laughing and sagely shaking my head at the wisdom, Timo--whizzdumb, indeed called to task--in this exceptionally lucid and spot on literary critique. I especially like the ending three stanzas. You have no idea how many times I've wanted to type this in a comment box or three. I wrote a lot of that stuff back when I had hormones, but even then I had more sense than to ask anyone else to read it.

  20. Sorry, Sensei. I'll make the next one simple and loud like a lawn mower engine.

  21. This is wonderful! I have to say I have a hard time getting through some of those overly sugary poems.

  22. Need something I can bite and chew on oh yeah, and what you said about needing to relate it to something... not always easy to do, at least for me... I fear I tend to stare into my belly button more than is good for the reader and it's something I definitely want to work on. How can I tell you I'm psychotic? Let me count the ways... Great poem as usual. How do you do it?

  23. AUDREY: Thanks for coming back...did you bring the beer?

    ANOTHERWANDERINGSOUL: Glad you could make it--Audrey fell asleep...let's drink up her beer.

    HEDGEWITCH: Thanks, sorry about the hormones.

    FIREBLOSSOM: Now that's a sharp comment.

    LAURIE: You're pretty fun yourself...I've heard.

    RAZZAMADAZZLE: Going into sugar overload got any

    SERENA: But it's such a cute belly button...

  24. If you don't clean your belly button for a very long time ...maybe you can grow anything in it ... including catnip:) Love, cat.

  25. Wispy spun sugary poems laced with self absorption ( gazing into belly button lint)..I've been working on this for some time and before you knock it let me tell you it is not easy to give a convincing portrayal of an incoherent pyscho. Try it some time!( oops sorry!:)

  26. Yes, there are times the lines leave you wanting or wondering. Enjoyed this!

  27. CAT: That's why I have installed a lint filter on my belly button!

    CRESSIDA DE NOVA: I'm sorry, but you're much too coherent to fit that profile!

    SARA V: Thanks for dropping in !

  28. Shame on me, and us...
    Hi Tim- Liked your tribite- inter-view at Toads



  29. DULCE: Thanks so much--big hug back!