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Tuesday, March 28, 2017

PARDON MY FRENCH


Sometimes, for politeness sake
(or goodness sake)
I try to come up with a euphemism
for the "F" word
but nothing seems to fit
(pardon the pun)


I've tried fu*k
but that smacks too much
of the hand of a censor for my tastes

There's fugg 
(as in "muddah fugga")
but that's a little too street
and I can't claim a lotta street cred
(though I've slept there a time or two)

Then there's fook
a bit too British, old chap
("put that fooking thing down
before you hurt yourself!")

And a myriad of old standbys

frig...frick...fock...
(Meet The Fockers--wink wink)
which have become so common
in the vernacular
they've lost all impact
(or should I say thrust?)

You could say it in French (baise)

and sound totally innocuous
on this side of the pond
(but not in the company of 
anyone wearing a Rasberry Beret).

Yep, try as I may

I've not found a good one
seems it can't be polite
and totally effective at the same time 
(a nugget for everyday living? )

So I guess I'll just say fuck it

and leave it at that

30 comments:

  1. Thoroughly enjoyed this frickin' poem!

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    Replies
    1. Thanks for the friggin' thumbs up!

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  2. That was fun to read. Even my grandsons say "freakin" now. We weren't even allowed to say "shut-up." The Irish say feckin. I once read that the word is derived from "plowing the field." That makes sense.

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  3. "Plowing the field"--ha ha...thanks for sharing. I know I've only scratched the surface (or maybe the itch) here.

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  4. Bawhahahahaha ❤️ loved this!!

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    Replies
    1. Sanaa...you are cooler than I thought--LOL

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  5. As the son of Irish parents can I recommend the very versatile feck or perhaps you can take the advice of a Scot who knows how to swear.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h68CfIUkPKs

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    Replies
    1. Much appreciated, Paul...my poem was FECK-less, and so am I.

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  6. ... and then there's always "cluck", like in "watt the cluck" ... voila! ... Love, cat.

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    Replies
    1. I see you've been hanging out with the hens again :)

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  7. One need not have to reinvent the wheel. Just say it the way it is!

    Hank

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  8. ha ha..it should be the way it should be...

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  9. I agree with above, that's the way it should be!

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    Replies
    1. Call a spade a spade...thanks, Bekkie!

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  10. Or, as they say down-under, cuffit.

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    Replies
    1. That's a new one on me. Will have to employ that in my next restroom wall poem!

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