My funky valentine
Reading the comics valentine
Oh, where oh where do I start?
Your looks are laughable
Yet, I'm so affable
I'm just gonna call you abstract art
Oh, your figure's less than chic
And your nose looks like a beak
When you speak
You're speaking Greek
You don't comb your hair for me
There's a pubic hair in my tea
What does it matter to me?
Each day is Valentine's Day
Of your figure I can't speak
A less than noteworthy physique
And there's an odor from your feet
That sets you apar-arrrt.
But don't wash your hair for me
Or change your underwear for me
Stay funky, valentine, stay...
Each day is Valentine's--
unless it's Groundhog,
President's, Saint Patrick's,
April Fool's, Mother's,
Father's, Columbus, or Labor...